I'm Not Gonna Spend My Life Being a Color

Stereotyping plays a huge part in my life. I manage an extremely diverse team of 100+ employees so I’m constantly keeping employees and myself in check when it comes to overcoming particular stereotypes. How annoying is it though to have to do this day in and day out?

I feel like this is another full-time job I have and it drives me nuts because I’m always thinking about stupid things like, “if I wear this name brand at work, will my employees/customers think I’m trying to rub my socioeconomic status in their face?” or “if I decline this merchandise return are they going to think I’m doing it because I’m young and trying to prove something?”

But honestly, I don’t think it’s fair for any one race or any one ethnic group to have to prove themselves. We are who we are right? In all honesty, the only time I “see color” is when someone makes it a point to out what race they are.

There was an instance at work where I had asked the next customer (an Asian woman with her two small children) in line to step over to the next available register to help them avoid additional wait time. While this young mother was maneuvering her things to step over, two black women knowingly stepped in front of her at the new register that had opened. Now the young mother was no longer technically in a line and looked upset so, I offered to personally ring up her merchandise at another register as an apology for inconveniencing her. All I had said out loud to this mom was, “Alrighty, let’s just move you right up here and I’ll ring you up. I’m sorry about that.” I believe, actually I know, this offended the two black women because they were making no effort to hide their remarks about me. I was called a “white bitch” and they told my employee that it was “because they were black” that I acted the way I did.

Actually no it’s not cause you’re black. It’s because you were rude and showed lack of respect for the fact that I was trying to help who was next in line, not who was quickest to get to the line. I DON’T have a personal vendetta out for individuals who are not the same color as me. I DO have a problem with you, if you are purposely rude and blatantly disrespectful to someone for no reason.

I wonder if those ladies would look at me different if they knew I’ve had to ask a white woman to leave my store and not come back because she told a Muslim employee that she needed to “go back to her country.” Uhhh, she was raised in Pontiac,MI? Just because she wears a Hijab and follows the practices of the Muslim religion doesn’t mean she’s from the Middle East.

I don’t get it. I don’t think that I make my choices in life or in business based on my own race/religion/age or the race/religion/age of others. Correct me if I’m wrong.

I think Three 6 Mafia said it best in their song Lolli Lolli (Pop That Body): “like Barack Obama said, it’s time for a change” 

Fat Girl in a Skinny World: Part 1

I started on my weight loss journey nearly 3 years ago and was surprisingly successful during my first run through. I started Weight Watchers May of ’07 with my mom in attempts to lose weight before our big family vacation to Jamaica. I weighed slightly over 200 pounds upon first weigh-in—a fact I’d been choosing to ignore since after high school. I worked my ass off that summer and shed nearly 25 lbs (ironically this is the summer I reconnected with my now boyfriend, ha-ha). Once school started up again in Fall ’07, it was all downhill from there. I got too busy to continue working out like I had been and my eating habits changed for the worse as I was constantly on the run . . . a likely excuse from any dieter.

Needless to say, I completely let myself go up until now. For three years, I ate what I wanted and worked out next to never. No surprise when I stepped on the scale in January and found that I had gained back my initial weight loss and then some. Today, I am 50 pounds heavier than when I “ended” last time around. Gross. Gag me.

My boyfriend says he loves me no matter what though, isn’t he sweet? I wonder if men know that us women can tell when they're lying through their teeth. 

Anyhoots, I’ve set a total weight goal of 80 lbs. to be lost in 16 months (so by May 2011). That number scares me half to death because it just seems like such big sum, which is why I set smaller milestone goals. I'm crossing my fingers that this mind-trick technique will keep me optimistic about this journey to a more fit me. My first target is 24 lbs.; a goal that I’m only 13 lbs. away from, having lost 11 lbs. already. YAHOO!

Now if only it would warm up so I could get outside more to exercise! (Yet another excuse. See my problem?)

And to let you know how I’m doing so far this week: I just now “smashed” a whole jar of salsa. It’s not the salsa itself that I’m worried about; it’s the number of chips I used to eat the salsa. I'll probably have guilt nightmares about this particular unnecessary caloric intake.

Hopefully tomorrow I won’t be as starved at the end of the night.

To bad I can’t twitch my nose like Samantha from “Bewitched” and be thin. A girl can dream right?

luckyme.xoxo

Enter: My life

Welp, consider this my first, official post of the month, of the year, of my life!

The idea of blogging came to me spontaneously while sitting in my economics class. It sounded like a lot of fun, something I'd like to do--it might even become a hobby, I guess.

Usually people wonder why others start blogs or write publicly about their lives and, honestly, I've thought this same thing about others. However, I've been searching for something to serve as an outlet for myself and maybe even help a few along this journey that I call life (here's where the critics chime in).

"How are you possibly going to help people?"

I'm hoping that I can help someone in the sense of making life easier or less difficult by giving them somebody they can relate to. It might give peace of mind knowing they're not the only one experiencing these feelings or going through this particular sitatuion--whatever "this" may be. I guess I won't really be the judge of that objective.

I can already visualize my boyfriend, Adam, rolling his eyes at the idea of me blogging. Too funny.


luckyme.xoxo